Hello....
How crazy our life is right?... sometimes we laugh at the memories
which are created along with our buddies..and at the same time we cry at the same
memories created by the same buddies wen thy are too far from us, not with us at
that moment, by remembering them... everyone will have their own kind of ups and will have their own kind of ups and will have their own kind of ups and will have their own kind of ups and downs some people overcome that problems and get successful in life and some people
not ... we all have the right to live every moment of our life.. not wasting time on
some shitty things happening around us.... to some people it takes only few minutes to get back to normal state after something happens...while to some people it takes fucking long
time.. its not their mistake too... its their mindset capacity which has grown like that from
many years.. it takes long time to change such mindsets... sometimes it will not be
possible no matter how much we try...
We have only one life right? Everyone knows that...so y can’t
we live that only one happily?.. there are many people around us who live happily
without any tensions..while some people who always look like depressed
ones..smiling often carrying heavy burden inside their head.. what i suggest is ,its
not worth keeping that for a long time we have to spit that out... ASAP...it will help
getting relief from that shit and u will feel happy too eventually…. I hear from many of my friends that ..we can’t have expectations and all... from anyone... i wonder how can even be possible ha? Don’t we expect from the god something who isn’t seen to our eyes till today? its not that we expect something big which they cant able to give to us... its simple things which we show.. things like care, love and many... at least we cant expect them back wen
we are giving them unwillingly...unconditionally?..its not that easy to say we shouldn’t have any expectations.. but even its true that we will get hurt wen those expectations are not
met...its normal human nature... no one can do anything about this.. If that person has really loved you just like you... he/she wouldn’t have made your heart broken for expecting from them.
life is not simple as we think... it has very rough way
throughout...its the way how we see that all the time..everyone will be having
frustrations..anger..sadness many of thing like this buried inside him/her.. but thy
cant be buried fr the long time...once that pit fills up, it must flow out... sometimes
the times wen it comes will be at the wrong time... sometimes it comes out in front of
wrong person... then later, we end up getting bad impression or misunderstandings in front of that person or time.... we promise so many times in front of our dear one's that i wont
leave you, i will be with you forever no matter wt... actually even i am one among
such people... some people live by those words… some people not...i come under both the categories but it only depends upon how the person treats me after i promise
those words... for the first time in my life i broke that promise which i said to one of
my best friend...
Even i regret it all the time every time i remember the time while
saying that... it wasn't easy for me to break that promise...it was that expectations
which made me to break that...it was that attachment which i had towards that
person more than anything... till today i had heart breaks wen some of my 4-5 best
friends left me... i knew how that was gonna feel that pain of leaving... but along
with that even its true that i had so much of unhappiness rather than happiness...
misunderstandings every time which weren't actually necessary...i tried my best
literally no one knows how i was going through everyday... it really sucks to be
treated like that from the person who was meant a hell lot to you... yes...even i have done some mistakes which later i regretted and asked for forgiveness....as the days passed.. there was no space for that forgiveness in that person’s heart...who used to call me best friend...
I wonder...what was the mistake that i have done to get punished like this... till today I don’t know where the things have gone wrong...i hope its better not to find that out because its too late for that things… then after holding for a long time...after getting tired of making the things right...but i failed every time i tried ... really its too cruel to happen like that...not every will be having the strong hearts... some people just cant digest some things... let me tell how i felt in that situation... i was feeling loosing that person whom i thought will stay for long
time.. i was feeling lonely every time for not being able to talk with that person as
before… was getting angry like anything... sometimes the frustration would flow
out like anything... i cried alone..no one knows that nether my parents nor my
brother... i started hiding that pain inside only....showing out the fake smile to my
family and people around... really its too hard person like me to digest what’s
happening in my life...some time i thought is this the reason y i m living my life? can i
just end up y life just for once n all.. then i thought its stupid anyone can do ....and
moreover it take lot of courage to take up one's own life... ha... as the days passed
on...life was moving as usual…
On one day.. something very bad happened and everything
was changed.. all of my sadness and frustration came out and shit happened... i will
get goosebumps still if i remember that day's situations.. and days passed again...
some of the quotes on social media's were making me feel embarrassed...every time i
look at them...i wasn’t able to be happy even without that person too... i was in the
edge of holding up and letting go forever... for some 2-3 days... an later on i decided
to get back instead of giving on that person... Really i wasn’t knowing how that person will treat me after that getting back ... i apologized for wt happened.. as if everything was my mistake only... then i had lost that huge trust which that person had kept on me... even i don’t
know how i lost that... i agreed for everything.. i just didn't wanted to loose that
person..at any cost... days were moving on...i thought it will go well..but there was a
twist which i hadn't expected t all...that person wasn't looking no more same to
me... for only reason y i had to sit quite was that i had to stand on the words which
i said.. i wont leave u again.. such things wont repeat again and all... else if i could
have reacted to every matter... same thing would have been repeated... still i cry byseeing how the things have changed so suddenly... still i cry sometimes by
remembering our good days.i know things wont be same as before... but i have
decided not to give up once again...no matter how much i suffer again... let that be...
after that i started loving that person unconditionally...
Now i don’t have such big expectations from that person... days
have to move on... we can’t stop our life just at this stage... i don’t know how many
days/months/years take to get back to normal... i will do my best everything it takes
to make everything right… I just want them to know in case if they read it.. I love that
person so much. miss every moment of being together … still its a hard pill for me
to take everyday..of whatever had happened...recently...
thank you...for reading…
Comments